How our culture destroys your relationship with your children

Society is based on its people, the cohesion of good people. It in our society we have processes that actually destroy your relationship with your children covertly. The old adage is divide to conquer and this applies strongly in the society in which you live. We tell our children to tell the always truth or they will be punished, yet it is a culture that causes damage and division and the subconscious mind not only remembers, but lays the foundation for personality through life’s early experiences, starting from childhood.

There are many cultural divisions but less look at the main three;

Santa Claus

Athough this seems fairly innocent is still is in fact a lie. You work very hard for your money, buy presents for your kids, and Santa Claus gets the kudos, and when poverty stricken children asks Santa Claus for a present and nothing arrives, they feel unworthy or as if they’re done something bad, as a song says “you better be good”, and the all knowing Santa keeps a record of all the bad kids who are unworthy of any presents.

Parents do their very best at Christmas time. And it’s a time of love, giving and sharing, but has been singularly reduced down to commercial greed. When children grow up and realise Santa Claus is one big fat lie, the damage is already done and not only that, it was the parents that lied to them, trust broken and then the division starts.

It is wise to tell your children the truth that Santa Claus represents the spirit of Christmas, the spirit of giving, and is representative symbolically by a man or woman dressed as Santa Claus. He’s not the person you’re seeing in front of you, he is a representative of the symbol of giving at Christmas time. The pantomime of sitting on Santa Claus’s lap and asking for everything, and then finding nothing arrives at Christmas time is a sadistic punishment and is cruel; And if things do arrive that you’ve asked for (from your parents secretly), then you have learnt a dysfunctional way of living in society, where everyone should support you and you don’t have to do anything in return.

Now I know this appears really really harsh, but if you tell the truth to children, in our example that Santa Claus as a representative of the spirit of Christmas and not actually a person who comes down a chimney (and who has one of them these days), and gives you presents,then everyone can enjoy Christmas what it truly is – the joy of family loving, giving and sharing.

The tooth fairy

Well getting paid for losing rotten teeth is simply a bad idea, if you have to give your kids money, give them for keeping their teeth clean and good. And for those parents who can’t put a coin under the pillow when a kid does lose a tooth, then that child feels unworthy and neglected.

The Easter Bunny

An ancient right of fertility, the all eternal egg – creation, and loving the earth simply reduced to a chocolate eating fest, with no no mention of nurturing the earth and nature, and looking after the planet we live on, working with the planet rather than being a parasitic upon it, heck if we throw the world away we have nowhere else to go. And by the way, rabbits don’t lay eggs.

Now all these festivals, represented time for community love and sharing. But they have been turned on their collective heads, hijacked for commercial greed that eventually leads to family division, broken promises and processes of divide and conquer. The corporate world is a soulless entity that wants money – (only money). Parents have learned to be a little wiser with their money, where children and teenagers spend like there’s no tomorrow, and never think of the future. So they are naturally and automatically targeted.

The other divisive processes television, social media, movies. With the same themes over and over again. Watch any soap opera and you get a recipe for destroying your life and living in misery. All these processes teach children to be dysfunctional, have no self esteem, lie, cheat steal, and worse still – maipulate to get what they want while never feeling worthy – divide and conquer.

Your relationship with your children should be a sacred place. And the subconscious mind which is usually set around five or six, never forgets the injustice, the hurt, the rejection, the lies, even if they are cultural lies and especially whenever, they’ve asked for something for Christmas and didn’t get exactly what they wanted or worse still…. nothing at all.

The truth works, and can be said in a gentle loving way that still keeps the magic, mystery and mythology of these sacred events in place, there to support family love and nurturing and not to divide it.

Peace.

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Prevention is always better than cure

When one thinks of hypnotherapy, we often think in terms of treating or managing problems such as; anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress, addictions, social issues – just to name a few.

Now they do say prevention is better than cure, and what most people don’t know, is that hypnotherapy is a wonderful process of strengthening and focusing the mind, yet centering on inner peace within. Can you imagine having a ninja type focus? Being able to set goals and achieve them? Being flexible within a fixed system that we have in our world today?

Not only can hypnotherapy help you with focus, desires and outcomes achieved, it can also help you not slip into anxiety and stress, you know the pressures that we are under today that appears all so natural. You can be highly stressed and not even know it.

What your grandparents had to process “mind” wise in one year, due to our modern lifestyle we have to now process in one day – a tsunami of information overload. Take into account social media, pressures of work, family, and trying to live a normal life, and you get a stress, or a background stress that were all too familiar with, the background stress becomes the norm.  I met many people who are so highly stressed with high blood pressure et cetera, yet when you ask them, they say they’re not stressed at all, because their high stress levels seem normal to them, and it is only when they relax that they realize how stressed they really were.

So I’ve developed a program that allows you to have that ninja type focus with that yoga like – peace of mind. So you manage yourself and the world around you in a way where it doesn’t manage you, or at worst drive you off a cliff. I call it having a “mind tune up“. Heck when a car is not running right we get it tuned up and serviced. When where not running right we are the last ones to ever know or recognize that.

An example of stress: A child is overtired and will scream for no reason at all, having forgotten the reason in the first place, while screaming, the child is more exhausted than ever but doesn’t realize that their stress is caused by exhaustion, the child is simply overtired and needs to rest. But the brain doesn’t recognize that need to rest so if you’ve ever been in a shopping center around three or four in the afternoon you’ll see this played out by children all over the place, children that a overtired and screaming while just really needing a nap.

Our inner child behaves the same way – having to meet work deadlines, dealing with pressure from everyone in the workplace, staying back late to fulfil work quotas, having to deal with traffic, travel, children, family, debt, relationships, et cetera. We simply don’t recognize the signal of, stress and being overtired. Most people simply head to the pub and use alcohol as a way of dealing with stress, unbeknownst that alcohol causes more biological and psychological stress keeping that state of inner tiredness in play –  while we try to make sense of an over congested super rushed world.

Wouldn’t it be good to just go to into that zone of inner peace, generating a ninja focus and getting things done. having peace power and control, not the outer control of having to control everything outside of yourself, but learning to flow with those things around you easily and effortlessly, so you’re not a casualty of the pressures of the world, but a true participant and creator of your world and enjoying it to the full.

By all means inquire about this wonderful program and book your mind tune up today.

Peace

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To health fund or not to Health Fund

Health funds are always in the business, of saving money – they are after all governed as an insurance company, and insurance companies do their best to save money and limit claims.

There’s a new push for health funds to not provide services for alternative health. The criteria for eliminating alternative health therapies is that the effectiveness of it has been placed under the criteria, of an “evidence-based structure”. In documentation received from health funds, they can have total access to your:

  • Personal file
  • Treatment given
  • Outcomes reached

Is this an invasion of your privacy?

Although they say that they “take your privacy seriously”, (your file won’t be made “public”), It does not offer total protection as anyone behind the scenes could see that data,  as we have seen time and time again, mistakes can happen, and although you will never know who may read your file and when,  it is ultimately a matter of trust.

What many people don’t know, is that in Australia, when you join a health fund they can:

  • Amend any of the rules any time they want.
  • By joining the health fund you have automatically given them permission to look at your personal file, treatment given, outcomes reached, and any other aspect that they want to look at.

This then complies with the privacy act as you’ve already given permission for such a personal peek into your private life.  They say the devils in the detail, i.e.  The small print. That way, they the health funds can test “evidence-based structures”. To either eliminate a service or keep it.

The thought of an insurance Corporation, having access to your personal private health process, and the therapies you have undertaken, to me is rather frightening. (And in my personal opinion contravenes therapist client confidentiality).  Once a corporation has that information, you do not know who looks at it, or how that information is handled, and if it will impact your employ-ability, which by the way, you will never know,  especially if you see a therapist for myriad of personal issues you’d rather not have potentially in the wild.

Not only can information be hacked but possibly misused by government or employees or other bodies. In the world of big data, data is big business and where the lines are blurred between your privacy, governments, and corporations as such, information enters uncharted territory.

As for me personally, it is my personal ethical duty to have confidentiality with the client unless there is an overriding legal obligation to contact the right authorities under the law. And as such, will no longer provide health funds for clients.

Clients,  who in the long run, will appreciate such privacy and confidentiality.

Peace

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Dream Destroyers

All too often you read, see and hear stories of people’s dreams, goals, and desires being dashed by so called “experts.” You know, those people who destroy you by thinking they know better, and in all good sweetness, put you down in a supportive way, conveying that you will amount to nothing. All too often, I see clients whose love and aliveness is dashed by one of these so called “experts” that purport to know better. Clients who then suffer low self-esteem, depression, misery and that then becomes a foundation of their lives.

You see, when a so-called expert tells you, you can’t even start something, or do something, it stops you even trying, and in the trying, to make discoveries, you enter a learning curve, you gain wisdom from your experiences, but that simply being told you can’t live your dream, you can’t have, you will amount to nothing –  is very destructive.

So why?

We live in a very competitive culture. You only have one winner and a zillion losers, and that thinking in itself is very destructive. The opposite is also true, when you’re doing really badly at something and people keep telling you your great at it. I had a client come to me around 30 years ago, she wanted to be a famous singer, that was her dream, her goal. I asked her where she had sung, she said she hadn’t sung anywhere at all but wanted to be a famous singer, that the reason she was seeing me was that through hypnosis I could somehow make her a  famous singer, I inquired further, where do you sing? “Nowhere” she replied. It came to be that she had never had lessons, never sung anywhere, not even in the shower. Yet wanted to be a famous singer.

I told her she should go and have some lessons to see if her voice could be trained in a way that she wanted. She got very angry and stormed out. So even though this was her dream,  she had never attempted it, I was still offering her opportunities to explore that avenue.

Now it could have been an imaginary bubble to keep her safe, to give her something to work towards because she lived a miserable horrible life of inactivity and doing nothing. The following sessions that she came to allowed her to ground herself and she did decide to go off and have some singing lessons. Now did she succeed? I don’t know. But at least she had a go, the adventure of trying and discovery – living.

All too often in our society people who don’t live their dream, put energy into their goals, find a way around things – lose their aliveness. The problem is simply we are told to be an individual and unique, as long as we remain a shade of grey, fit in and don’t rock the boat, and when you take competition into that, as well as other people’s egos, the pecking order to success, and we wonder why there are so many mental health issues plaguing our society today.

Is is amazing that native tribal people who are just being discovered in the jungle, have zero mental illness. They help each other, they support each other, they teach each other valuable skills to survive. You will find no competitive winners or losers there.

Is competition a good thing?

Yes. If represented in the right way in strengthening your skills. Competition is great if you don’t have a culture where everyone praises the one winner and destroys everyone else attitude. In the soccer World Cup, you will see one standout player scoring goals he does so for the team. However, in the same World Cup you can only have one winner, and the losing team, feels like crap and utterly destroyed, but more importantly, not good enough. Yet here we see the best players on the entire planet, those who are at the top of their game, feeling like crap because the other team won.

So what message does this send our young people of today. Simply, to get to the top you have to crush and destroy all opposition.  This is absolutely the wrong approach.

Then take into account age, always having to defend your position. The young people climbing up the social, work or corporate ladder, where in our culture age is seen as a health condition. Yep, being old is not a good thing in the competitive society in which we live.

I was watching television, there was this show about renovating house and gardens. One team renovated the garden so beautifully, so uniquely, it was simply a touch of genius. Yet the judge trashed it, destroyed them completely, simply because it wasn’t a shade of grey like every other house. It wasn’t what the judged liked, so he trashed them and psychologically, the so called “Expert”, destroyed them. Rather than, the exploration of a wonderful job, of unique creativity. The garden did look beautiful. Yet those on that team, you could tell, would never ever be creative again. They would just simply stick to bland and commonplace.

When I work with people, I strive for the balance. What is your dream? Let’s explore and discover that, let’s find a way if that’s possible. Some people retire to then start exploring and living their dreams. 99% never do. There’s an old saying, visions of the young (all the things you want to do explore and succeed in). Become visions of the old (that “if only”, and the sadness of never attempting where they should have).

Find people who can support you in your goal. Be flexible enough to learn new skills, find a way. Put energy dedication and persistent work in achieving your dreams. And only in doing this we find the right fit for you. There was once an actor who was okay at acting, but still felt of emptiness. That actor ended up directing films, winning awards, living life in a fulfilled way and having a ball.

Let my hypnotherapy, help you find your goals, and to discover what you love, and what you want to achieve.

Peace

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Big Brother – Social Media and Cyberspace  

The one thing that should connect us all, social media, is the one thing that causes a lot of mental anguish and discord. As Big Brother slowly and methodically encapsulates our life like a snake strangling its prey ever so slowly, or like quicksand that slowly sucks you in.

You have to master social media apps in a way that works for you, rather than you being a slave to them and other peoples opinion.

An example of this is Facebook: It wants you to connect to everybody that you know, all the contacts in your emails, phone, etc, even people you don’t want to ever see again or connect with.  But Facebook is reminding you that you should connect to everybody and everyone. Like a spider in a spider’s web once you are snared it’s hard to get out. If you don’t connect with friends, then Facebook reminds you every single moment that you should. LinkedIn and Twitter are just as pushy. Let’s take apps for an example, when you download an app from Google play, you have to give permission to access your photos your friends your emails your contacts, your computer, well everything connected in Cyberspace. It’s not like you can opt out if you want that app.

Now I see this or is a huge invasion of privacy, and a huge whittling away of your rights. The internet to my knowledge, does not self monitor in a way that simply protects you from personal Cyber information gathering, Cyber Bullying or Sales Marketing.

In fact you only have the right to accept all the conditions of apps and social media portals and that adds to all your personal information being on-line, thus building a personal profile that may effect employment thus adding pressure – increasing your personal stress.  What you place On line – Stays on line – Forever.

The Internet is great for marketing from corporations, as they can build a profile on you and target you with advertising.  The downside of this lack of foresight is that the internet pushes every boundary and this gives governments the excuse to restrict,  or close down, or monitor cyberspace as best that they can.  The Internet should serve you (information, education and news) not you serving it. Remember it is not your personal diary.

Life is hectic, it’s easy to send an email, or connect with Facebook for that birthday wish rather than a card, meet-up or call,  but in the end our social structures suffer, and I believe our mental health suffers. No longer do we get together with friends, we connect electronically. No longer do we meet at the coffee shop, we have pretend coffee over the Internet.

Then there’s the cursed ads, just do a Google search for something, and you see endless ads for that product you’re looking for come up in every other app that you have including Facebook.

Is there a solution?  Yes. A simple one, you can text, phone your friends and arrange an actual meet up if possible, and I highly suggest you quit or completely minimize your social media activity. Clear your cookies on your computer, this will reduce the focused product ads that you originally searched fro popping up. Actually go out and socialize, meet people and your friends. Enjoy life. It’s the human thing to do.

If you are super stressed or super conditioned or a slave to social media, with social media  being your life, then by all means arrange some hypnotherapy (Skype or in person where applicable), simply to get you back on track – bringing a balance back between the real world and your exploration of Cyberspace.

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Getting in touch with your super self

You will often hear the phrase “trust your intuition”. Yes we all have intuition, an emotional field that’s extraordinarily similar to radar were it senses ahead for danger, or those places and situations that are safe. I feel it is a carryover from primitive times when language was limited and the tribe had to sense a good place to tread, or a bad place to avoid. No one really wanted to be lunch for the saber tooth tiger! In our modern world language reigns supreme and intuition has dwindled to almost a non-existent place. Yet intuition, or that inner connection with your super self is what most extremely wealthy and successful people point to, that made them very successful and rich.

We often think that a university degree will automatically lead to success, however recent statistics point to that not necessarily being the case for everyone. Most universities are big business and degrees stretching over 4 to 6 years is a huge chunk in any person’s life with a huge debt as well. Also be mindful that a mortgage of today will often take an entire lifetime to pay off. Especially when medium house prices are around the $900,000 mark in the big cities in Australia. Take into account interest rates and you realize you’re a debt slave forever.

Often people think that to reach success, fulfillment or financial freedom that being entrepreneurial is the key! The latest greatest idea will lead to success.  Or the Internet! There are many entrepreneurs that have fallen on their sword. Many play the stock market have also fallen by the wayside. And now the kingpin is bitcoin. Yet here also, danger may lie in wait.

So how does one navigate whether 9-to-5 job is best, or a degree is best, or being entrepreneurial is best, Or being in the service industry is best, or being an apprentice is best. You get the point…..  What is the right path for you?

It’s easy to spot the leopard in the field. It is way harder to navigate the human zoo. This is where intuition comes into play. Those people who develop high intuition are the most flexible in any fixed system. They’re not stubborn or stuck, they are innovative focused and determined to follow through. There is a big difference between stubborn and focus, and being flexible within any system is one of the keys to success. Before I talk about intuition;

I want to share a metaphor.

In the gold rush days people would go out of pans picks and shovels hoping to strike it rich. Many did not. It was simply a hit or miss thing. Mining life was hard and treacherous. Yet those who became rich were those that sold the pans picks and shovels. The miners had the dream of striking it rich. The suppliers of pans picks and shovels recognised an opportunity.

Now here is where intuition comes into play, trusting your feelings on the job interview, that idea that you have, the feeling of how you would like to service humanity with your skill set, all takes observation, training, dedication and follow-through. Most people link career with how they personally feel and this is a big mistake. I’ve met many people with low self-esteem making money hand over fist. I’ve met many dreamers that sit in the lounge room playing video games and achieving nothing and visa versa.

Recognizing what is working and what the trends are as essential. Taking the emotional risk, a leap of faith and trust. New age people simply think they can manifest with the law of attraction having to do no work at all….. No short cuts to wealth. Yet, trusting your intuition can allow you to be in the right place at the right time.  But more than that, it allows you to become the master of your life.

Being flexible and allowing yourself to add value to what you do is essential. “When you deal with people go the extra mile”, is often the saying. If you’re in a job you hate you’re in the wrong job, or possibly in that job for the wrong reasons. Not only does your life have to add value to you, it has to add value to other people.

Intuition and the connection to intuition puts you in  the flow, being in the right place at the right time take some brain training, but not the brain training that you think. The brain training I’m talking about is that of lowering your brain waves from normal consciousness down into alpha or theta states with specific exercises and purpose  with follow through. Hypnotherapy is excellent at fast track you into those states. With the added value that I can preset your subconscious mind to achieving the goals that you want to build and explore.  But more importantly, to enhance your intuition. To enhance your focus, to enhance your ability to observe and to take advantage of opportunities that will put you ahead or in a good place in life.

Are you creative? flexible or are you stuck in a cycle, a soap opera, TV, or family drama conditioned by television that is taking all your energy and limiting your life. Do you live in fantasy-land. Intuition allows you to move into the right place at the right time and take advantage of opportunities. Remember life is never meant to be fair. If it was fair that there would be no struggling people in the world, no wars, no famine, no systems by governments that restrict, destroying all limit people getting ahead in life. Understanding that life is not fair is a sobering thought. Knowing that it is only you that can push yourself into being flexible, activating your intuition, and activating what drives you with the help of hypnotherapy. Without hypnotherapy many people fall over and simply give up on their dreams.

My hypnotherapy process is personally and specifically designed to you, simply because you are an individual even though you’re part of a collective. Let me help you achieve. Understand that people have two powers, will power, and won’t power. How you’re won’t power today, I bet it’s strong. Being of service to others as a start but is not the whole picture, as you get in touch with you, your drives, your personality, your environment. This helps me help you to break free of the gravity or better still the molasses that you’re stuck in.

Hypnotherapy can be arranged by Skype or in person. Today, now and be the start of a wonderful adventure. To connect with me simply email and your journey starts thank you.

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Generating A Prosperity Consciousness

According to a search on google: Prosperity means: “wealth, success, profitability, plenty, welfare, comfort, security, well-being, successfulness”.

I believe prosperity is more than that. Prosperity is a way of being, thinking and behaving. It is all about improving yourself on all levels and a continuum of learning. This involves building and maintaining your personal ethics and your code of conduct.

Let’s look at those three keys more closely.

1:  Being: Focuses on mindfulness. How do my actions affect others? It brings into play spiritual growth and improving inner balance and emotional well-being. Also how you appear and express to yourself and others. (Dress, style, cleanliness etc.)

2:  Thinking: Focuses on inner thoughts and also communication to those around you, improving your word vocabulary, focusing on being a better version of yourself and refraining from gutter talk, gossip, swearing and damaging and rude behavior that demeans you. Keep your word and keep your private life private, if there is not a good thing to say about someone else, then say nothing. Focus on what works rather than complaining about what doesn’t.

3:  Behaving: Developing a style and class that is real and second nature. Honesty at all times.   An example: We grew up in an average working class home, but my mother would always go to work dressing in her best and looking a million dollars. She commanded respect simply by looking her best without overdoing it or bragging to others. Nor did she judge anyone else’s circumstances treating everyone equally and with respect.

As you raise your game, you build a natural prosperity consciousness. My aunt Zelma lived on a rural property, she had little money but her house was simple, yet beautiful. Clean, open and inviting. A wood stove, often in use with plenty of wonderful home cooking. She was prosperous.

Prosperity is not about just money or greed. I know a lot of rich people who are not prosperous. A lot of people who are debt rich, yet not prosperous. Money is only a small part of building a prosperity consciousness. Nurture your body, mind and spirit yet remaining humble open and happy.

Affirmations are often expounded upon by new age gurus, but not fully understood, saying just an affirmation will not bring you prosperity (see my article  on Affirmations here in my blog).

Above all, take your time, raise your energy and be true to yourself. My prosperity Hypnotherapy program can help you build a prosperity consciousness getting you on your way to being successful and having a happy life. Understand that a prosperity consciousness encompasses a way of life full of ethics, common sense, observation and wise action.

Peace.

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